Love of my Life

Love of my Life
Happy moments... Praise God. Difficult moments... seek God. Quiet painful moments... Trust God. Every moment... Thank God.

February 14, 2010's the worst part

There's something going on in my brain and I want to know exactly what it is. My peripheral vision is getting worse. If you think about the hands on a clock, when I look straight to the "12", I can not see anything past "2 o'clock". This makes it a little difficult when you're out walking the malls. Yes... I found myself walking into several things.

Today at church, the lighting was causing throbbing to my right eye. Yes, something is going on.

Hannah returned to school today and upon her departure, Dad handed me a letter from her. A letter which I tried to read, taking 15 minutes to get through the first 2 paragrahs, so I set it aside so my Mom could read it to me later. Yes, something is going on in my brain that wasn't there only a month ago.

Hannah's letter was very touching... she reminded me to not let my tumor define me. That my heart and passions define me. She reminded me to stay strong. And she listed the following scripture...
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in prayer & petition present your requests to God" Matthew 6:34

And.. she has given me a my "theme song".. can you guess? "I Will Survive!".. here's a few of the lyrics

Go on now go walk out the door
Just turn around now
'cause you're not welcome anymore (aka...Tumor)
weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
you think I'd crumble
you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will Survive
as long as I know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
and I'll survive

Tomorrow I'm off for another MRI. Tuesday I'll meet with the dr. Stay tuned... I'll update you on Tuesday with the news.

At this point I'm also thinking that I should move up my wedding date. I'd really like to have my hair when I get married... and the only reason we were waiting was to give me time to finish school.... There's a lot to consider.. things such as are my doctors covered on Greg's insurance plan. Is there a preexisting condition waiting period, etc. I hate the fact that I even have to factor in practical things like insurance....

If you're wondering how I'm doing, I'm scared shitless. At the same time I have a peace about it...and I hear that heaven is a better place.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Lindsey,

    I work at LSHS and remember you as a beautiful young woman who could do anything she set her mind on and wouldn't let anything get in her way. I'm sure that hasn't change and you will beat this! My prayers are with you.

    Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
    Philippians 4:6

    Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matt 6:34

    God bless!
    Charlie Minton