Love of my Life

Love of my Life
Happy moments... Praise God. Difficult moments... seek God. Quiet painful moments... Trust God. Every moment... Thank God.

August 30, 2010

Head for the Cure 5k

God graced us again. Sunday morning was beautiful and Lindsey's determined spirit got her there at the race to see the wonderful people who came out to support her and support finding a cure for brain cancer. Lindsey was a recipient of one of the five Keeping the Faith awards and the Lace up for Lindz team received an award for having the 2nd highest number of participates. Our final count was 186.

Regarding Lindsey's current health issues....

Anti-seizure medication was prescribed on Saturday, with some trepidation due to Lindsey's sensitivity to the drugs. Within hours, personality changes surfaced. While she is not mobile at this time, it didn't stop her from trying. Twice I found her on the floor next to the bed as she attempted to get up. The 2nd time she engaged me in a conversation stating "Mom, I need to talk with you about my diagnosis." We proceeded to have a disjointed conversation about many things as she attempted to explain to me a dream, a very real dream, she was having.

To help to keep her safe, Hospice delivered a bed with railings. Sunday brought on difficulting keeping food down, along with sporadic, dis-jointed and random conversation. A call into Hospice resulted in stopping the new medication for 24 hours. We'll assess the changes and develop a new plan to combat the seizures.
With Lindsey's weakened right side, physically caring for her is becoming more challenging. She is not able to walk or stand by herself any longer. Thank goodness we had the strength of Todd this weekend so that he and Bob could carry Lindsey up/down the stairs. Lindsey's bedroom will be her primary location going forward. We've moved things around a bit to make room for a twin mattress on the floor so that one of us can sleep in her room at night. Tonight sleep is intermittent as I rub her back and respond to her many random comments and conversation.

August 28, 2010

Head for the Cure Pre-Race Happy Hour

Friday, August 26th, we hosted a pre-race happy hour at the Zen Zone. Race participants picked up t-shirts, visited with Lindsey and enjoy appetizers and drinks. The event was a wonderful success... we started with 12 boxes of t-shirts and left with only 2 to take to the race Sunday morning. 182 people signed up for team "Lace-Up for Lindz!! This is simply amazing to us... Lindsey is very touched by your support.
It was great to see everyone and meet the participants who I had only known by name. A special thanks to the Zen Zone for allowing us to use their facility. Thank you to my friends who helped with t-shirt organization, packaging and set-up the day of the event.

It was good to see Lindsey's smiles as she visited with her friends and relatives.

Saturday started as a normal day... breakfast, sleeping, etc. I made lunch for the gang (Todd, Jake, Jeff, Hannah and Lindsey) and we enjoyed great, random conversation. Lindsey participated as she could. We all chuckeled as she came back for seconds of the Papa Murphys cookie dough (a weakness of mine when I'm a bit stressed). After lunch, the girls headed outside to work on posters for the race. Our dear Hannah was outside with Lindz when Lindz had a seizure. The first we've had in about 2 months. While it was not a grand mal seizure (whew), it did last for about 15 minutes, and then on off for the next 2 hours. The hospice nurse came out and adminstered Lorazepam as needed until the seizures calmed down. A phenobarb suppository was given and the oral doses will start tomorrow. Mobility is getting much more difficult. We are now using the wheelchair to move about the house.
As I visited with Lindsey about the race and her ability to attend, she very firmly stated. "I'm going." So with God's continued good graces, she'll be there to support this great cause and receive one of the "Keep the Faith" awards. Thank you to those who nominated.

August 24, 2010

It's quiet in the Morris Home

Todd and Hannah have returned to school and it's very quiet in the Morris home. No more boys showing up every night to do P90X, no more friends stopping by to swim, play games, and visit. Todd headed back to MU last week. Bob, Lindsey and I made a road trip to MU on Saturday to deliver a new mattress to Todd and a few other things. We also toured the new Union dining facility. It's very nice. I've attached a few photos from our day trip. Todd is very quiet and reserved... it's hard for him to see what is happening to his sister. As you can see from picture, the steroids are giving Lindsey nice round, beautiful cheeks. (At least I think they are beautiful... she on the otherhand doesn't like what she sees in the mirror.)

Lindsey has been awakening at night to take care of personal needs. We're trying to get her to ring a bell so we can help.. Most nights she forgets. Sometimes she falls. Sunday night after assisting I finished my slumber next to her. As I was putting her to bed Monday night I asked her if she remembered that I had slept with her the previous night. Her she looked at me ever so intently, "more often. You should do that more often." So I did. I stayed with her Monday night. Tonight at dinner, I asked her if she remembered that I stayed with her. As her eyes welled up, she responded "Yes... I felt so special. I don't like being alone in my bed." And she cried. So... Bobby, until Greg arrives, I'll be sleeping with our girl... and that's exactly where Bob would want me to sleep right now.

Quiet is okay. Lindsey and I are working on her t-shirt quilt. She has selected her t-shirts, the fabric, and we are enjoying putting together shirts from her past, present, and we're saving room for the Lace-Up for Lindz t-shirts, which today represents the future.
Thank you to those who are praying for Todd and Hannah as they transition back to school. It's difficult for them to be away at this time.

August 22, 2010

Head for the Cure Update and T-shirt pick-up iformation.

This update is specifically for Head for the Cure 5k participants and/or individuals who purchased a Lace Up for Lindz t-shirt, that may not be walking in the 5K. Thank you again for supporting the Lace Up for Lindz team and helping to find a cure for brain cancer, One Step at a Time!


This message includes important information about picking up your T-shirts and Race Day information.

As team captain, I am picking up all the Head for the Cure t-shirts. You DO NOT need to go to Ward Parkway Mall, as stated on the Head for the Cure website.

With a generous donation from a friend, we're having a Pre-Race Happy Hour on Friday evening, August 27th, from 5pm - 7pm at the Zen Zone, in Lee's Summit,Mo. This is an opportunity for you to pick up your t-shirts, have a drink and some appetizers if you have time, and hopefully say hello to Lindsey (providing she feels up to being out). If your t-shirts have not been paid for, please plan on paying when you pick up. While I received a generous donation from a sponsor for t-shirts, the screen printing was not free.

Pre-Race Happy Hour Details

Location: Zen Zone
413 Northwest Murray Road
Lee's Summit, MO 64081

The Zen Zone is located off of Murray road (you can see it from 350 highway) between Chipman Road and 3rd Street, It's across the street from the John Knox Pavilion, and in the same parking lot as the John Knox Thrift Store. While you're picking up your t-shirts and visiting, check-out the classes offered at the ZenZone. I personally love the Pilate's, Hot Yoga, and Power Core Yoga offerings.

If you are unable to make it Friday night, other t-shirt pick-up options are listed below:

* Pick-up Saturday morning, August 28th, at the Zen Zone between 9:30 and 10:30.
* Pick-up at the Race - I will only bring the t-shirts for those walking. Non-race participants will need to make other arrangements to get the t-shirts from me.

Race Day Information

We'll meet at the Head for the Cure Team Village. The Team Village will be located on the northeast side of Building 40 in the parking lot and extending onto the grassy median between the race course and the port-a-potties.

Meeting time: 7:30am - for Team Pictures!!!

Location: Team Village - Look for the Team Lace Up for Lindz poster which will stake out our team meeting spot. And... of course look for all the Purple T-shirts! We'll also have a bouquet of pink and purple helium filled balloons to mark our area. The team picture will be taken by the village, in front of a large banner that will be provided as a back-drop. Head for the Cure will have a photographer to take pictures. I'm sure we'll have others taking pictures also.

Parking: I've been reassured that there is plenty of parking at Corporate Woods. Please plan plenty of time to park, and walk to the team meeting spot. (Bob and I will be there by 6am to mark our spot so if you happen to arrive early, we'll be there!)

For team members who plan to walk and aren't concerned with being timed, you will line up for a parade that will start out of the Team Village area after the start of the 5k. Walkers will exit the Team Village through a special archway onto the course a few minutes after the race starts and the runners wishing to be timed are already on the course.

I think that covers the details. If you have questions, please send me a message or give me a call. My cell number is 816-868-3118.

One step at a time, we will help find a cure for this awful disease. Thank you again for your support!

All the best to you...

Sandy and Bob Morris

August 20, 2010

Keeping the Faith Award -

The Head for the Cure Organization has a "keeping the faith" award. If you know Lindsey, and if you have been following the blog, you know that she would be a very deserving recipient of the award. Please consider nominating her. Nominations are due by Wednesday, August 25. Here's the information from the Head for the Cure website.

Award Recipients:

Each year brain cancer patients are honored with a special Head for the Cure Keeping the Faith award. Their journeys, courage, strength, will and faith are an inspiration.

Each year at the 5k Run and Walk event, additional Keeping the Faith recipients will be honored. For the future, please feel free to nominate a deserving individual who exemplifies the above attributes and whose battle against brain cancer can inspire others with the disease.

Submit a brief information about your Keeping the Faith nominee and the reason you believe the nominee is deserving. Please send the nomination to:

Julie Watkins

Head for the Cure

250 Richards Road

Kansas City, MO 64116

The nomination can be emailed. A picture would also be beneficial.

If you have signed up to participate in the race, or ordered a shirt, additional information about t-shirt pick-up and race information will be posted on the Blob by Sunday. Stay tuned!

August 16, 2010

Getting Weaker... but Super Excited

The title of this post is so Lindsey. While things can be going badly, she looks for opportunities to experience joy and excitement.

Sunday night, as I got Lindsey ready for bed, I did a run down of the week ahead. When I got to the part about going to Aunt Nancy's on Tuesday she blurted out, "I know". "I'm SUPER EXCITED." It was so good to hear these words. It was great to hear the expression of excitement. Even in the midst of increased pain, a weaker right side, and increased difficultly in managing mobility in our home, Lindsey finds joy in being with those she loves. Especially her Aunt Nancy. Nancy has decided to change her schedule so that she can spend time with Lindsey during the weekdays. Precious time. When Nancy asked me about this I responded by saying, "How can I say no to something that Lindsey loves so much?" When you ask Lindsey what she'd like to do, it's very common for her to respond "Aunt Nancy". Lindsey will have the joy of spending a couple days a week with Nancy while she can.
Greg is in the final days of school in the Navy and is hoping to be here the first part of September. He has filed his requests and is waiting for approval. He's hoping for 30 days before he departs for Japan in October. The Lindsey he'll come home to is very different from the Lindsey he left on July 5th. Please pray for Greg. He is a great man. He is a man that will need to be lifted up in prayer as he sees what the cancer is doing to his wife.
Posted here is Aunt Nancy and Greg. Two people that Lindsey finds herself getting "SUPER EXCITED" about.

August 09, 2010

Sisters... and Race Update

Tomorrow I ride back with Hannah to school at TCU. She's taking a car back this year and I'm heading down with her. Yes, I'm the nervous Mom who doesn't want her to have to drive 8 hours by herself for the first time. I know the move back this year will most likely be more difficult than last year. I want to spend some time with her and help with the move-in.

Hannah has been a blessing all summer. She has helped with Lindsey; helped around the house; and in every case simply just did what needed to be done without me needing to ask. I will miss her. She will miss us. She will miss her friends and her support group here in KC. Thank goodness for technology... Facebook, Skype, text, etc makes it easier to be far apart.

School will keep her very busy as she has been accepted into the Neely Fellows Program at TCU. Only 30 students a year are accepted and the program is rigorous, with a purpose to educate and develop students of extraordinary potential with both curricular and co-curricular experiential learning opportunities. Yes, we are very proud of her. She had a great first year and continues to just amaze us with her work. Staying busy is good right now. Between school work, and sorority life, she will have little time to think about anything else (umm.. except maybe her friend at MU.)

I love these photos of Hannah and Lindsey in the pool, taken just this past weekend. Again, an example of Hannah's helpful nature.

Please pray for a safe trip to Fort Worth and for a good week at home. We have a few friends helping with Lindsey during the week and with meals while I'm out of town. Thank goodness for friends and family. We are truly blessed.

Race update - I just heard from Head for the Cure that we may have one of the largest teams! THAT IS AMAZING!!! So far 152 people are signed up for the Lace Up for Lindz team. Thank you for your support! While it's to late to order the Lace Up for Lindz t-shirts, it's not to late to sign up for the team! The support of Lindsey's friends, associates from work, school, etc has simply been tremendous. Thank you.

August 06, 2010

Fighter, Fierce, Fantastic

While Lindsey's responses are normally short, this week she said the following:

* "Where did you go?" You see we've had this tradition of her joining me in my bedroom while I'm getting ready for work. She sits and has coffee and I chat with her about my day ahead. Twice this week I went into work earlier than usual.. .I thought I'd let her sleep in. I thought she might not notice. She noticed. She remembered. And she asked. She doesn't care how early, just wake her up for her morning coffee and conversation with me.
* "Rub my back all over."
This was said as I was laying with her one night. Of course, I gladly massaged her back. When I thought she was asleep and I got ready to get up, she said "please don't leave."
* "I feel different"
Lindsey's body is having to work much harder to do the simple things. Breathing is very labored at times, even at rest. The right side is getting weaker. She stumbled this week and evidently rolled her ankle at the time, and it's now black and blue. She didn't even feel it.
We strive to have Lindsey go through this journey as gracefully as possible. We want those that know her to remember her for when she was at her best. While changes occur daily, most we will keep private so as to maintain Lindsey's dignity. Please pray for Lindsey and the family as we continue to provide care.
This photo is a picture of a card I received in the mail. Ironically, from a friend whose mother has brain cancer. Seeing a loved one suffer is difficult. My friend's mother was diagnosed shortly after retirement. A retirement the couple had saved and looked forward to as they had a dream to travel. A dream that was shattered by brain cancer.
As the card says "Fighter, Fierce, Fantastic... I've got a whole different "F" word for cancer"... .. and as my friend states "and I put it on a bracelet!" Yes, the bracelets are becoming quite popular.

On another note, I happened to stumble across a bible lesson given by a young man that I know, and in it he shared "God has a plan for all of us and if we follow his instructions and trust in him we can all live with him in heaven forever." I know Lindsey will live in heaven. She is a believer. I know that her trust in Him is why she is at peace should God's will have her leaving us sooner than we would like.
This young man went on to say, "If we died right now, where would we go? Is there something else that we should be doing to ensure life in heaven? His parting question is a good one for all of us to ponder.